Sesame Seeds and Murphy

Sesame Seeds

The other day we bought a salad dressing called "toasted sesame seed." I weep for the sesame seed guy. His is a sad plight in life. I can not but help feel bad for him. You know, he probably can't toast very many seeds a day, even if he works far into, or through, the night. I can picture him sitting next to the toaster, thinking, "You know, I wish that this toaster was a four slot instead of a two slot."
He probably wastes a lot of money on buying new toasters because the toasters are not very durable and he forgets and pushes down too hard and breaks the handle. How he even gets enough to make a bottle of salad dressing is a mystery to me. I think that we should all pray that he will get some sense and try something different in life.


I dislike Murphy

Some things in life are not fair. like Murphy's law. Murphy's law is that whenever you drop your toast it lands on the side with the peanut butter on it. It does not matter that you spent ten minutes making it just the way you like it, buttered all the way to the sides, a thick coating of peanut butter, and a sweet smidge of jam, it still lands on the side that you don't want it to. ( I don't know if smidge is the right word for jam but I know that dollop is not. Dollop is sour cream.)

Another part of Murphy's law is that when you drop a plate when nobody is looking, it does not break, but if your mom is looking it breaks. I don't know why. It just does. I wish that Murphy had not made it a law. He is a cruel and unfeeling person. I wonder why Congress voted for it. The President could have at least vetoed it! Then we would still be free to drop our toast butter side up.

The part of Murphy's law that I am experiencing right now is that when you are looking for the broom to sweep up a broken plate and a ruined piece of perfect toast you can never find it. (Sigh.)